As part of our “For Such a Time as This” series, we will be interviewing individuals from our Calvary community about how Jesus is working in their life and in the lives of those around them through this time of pandemic. Each week we will interview someone new, based on the reflection questions provided by our teaching team in the previous hub entry.

This week, we will be checking in with Clorinda Schroeder. Clorinda is married to Garth, and they have two sons, Sawyer (5), and Forrest (2). They started attending Calvary about four years ago. Clorinda is a registered nurse and currently working in intensive care. Before this time of pandemic, Clorinda liked to spend time outdoors, taking family bike rides in the ravine, camping, hiking, running, snowboarding and exploring new places. Currently, courtesy of social distancing for COVID-19, she has started colouring and puzzling. Clorinda says she misses worshipping together as a congregation, seeing all the familiar faces and all the kids running around and playing together at Calvary. Thanks Clorinda, for sharing some of your reflections on what Jesus is doing in and around you lately!

What is your deepest hope today? What do you hope for, in this moment more than anything else?

My deepest hope and what I am grasping on to these days is that God is good, that he has provided me with a true and solid foundation, that he is near, right beside me in the most intimidating moments. When I am challenged or fearful, I am finding myself whispering “Jesus”, simply saying his name in the midst of a chaotic moment is like throwing over an anchor in my soul. My deepest hope is that he is with me, he is for me, and that I do not enter anything in this life alone.

What do you need to lament over today? What is causing you distress right now?

Today is a good day, but since the start of this pandemic I feel like I have been going through various stages of grief.  The social distancing and canceling of all things has been challenging, but it is set apart from the shock and frustration of the fact that I am an ICU nurse at a time like this. Trying to simply figure out the process of entering and leaving work has felt mentally tiresome. Did I hand sanitizer after that last door knob? Did I remember to wipe down my name tag? Garth can you tell the kids not to touch me when I get home?  Should I leave my shoes outside?  How should I pack my lunch…can I still bring my water bottle?  A contagious virus is not something new to anyone in healthcare, but the indiscrimination and  the speed of this virus certainly is, and this isn’t exactly something I would willingly sign up to expose myself or my family to.

I have been having to remind myself that God knew this is where I would be and it isn’t an accident. A couple weeks ago Erin Camponi shared the story of the Good Samaritan for Children’s ministry, and Sawyer and I were talking about who we want to be in the story. Of course, I don’t want to be the priest or the Levite, I want to be the Samaritan. I want to love and care for this man that is beaten and half dead on the road. This simple and familiar story was a revelation for me, a reminder of who God calls me to be and the numerous doors he opened for me to be doing this in my vocation. 

On a broader scale, I feel heavy for thousands of people in intensive care units all over the world fighting for their lives.  For the thousands that have lost that fight and the ones that are grieving that loss and can’t even hold a proper funeral in their remembrance. I am nervous for my co-workers that are older or immunocompromised. I’m deeply disturbed that there are healthcare workers in other countries that are fighting this virus without proper protective equipment – how can that be? I hate that we are now caring for patients in these very critical states with no family beside them, no loved one holding their hands and encouraging them to fight, or worse, at their bedside when they take their last breath. These are your children Lord, you love them deeply, how is all this okay?  How is this all going to come together? 

You are good Lord, always, I have to hold on to that hope.

Read the blogpost these questions were taken from here. Please feel free to encourage Clorinda or share your own reflections on these questions in the comments below!